Success Circle – Cleaning Up Your Clutter
Guest Expert, Marla Dee of Clear & Simple. Marla is my professional organizer and her tips have helped me let go of clutter and create harmonious space!
Download “Cleaning Up Your Clutter”
Perfect is Great, DONE is Better
A few years ago as I was working on a new project that I was struggling to complete, my coach at the time said these valuable words, “Perfect is great, done is better.”
It rang a very loud bell for me. To this day that phrase is on a simple 3×5 card in my office that I see every day.
It has served me well over the last few years as a wisdom that helps me to move forward and produce, even when I know (and accept) that it won’t be perfect.
In the quest for achieving our goals – growing a business, starting a project, producing a website/book/event/product, you name it – we want to produce high quality content, right? Which is a great thing! I will always strive for excellence and quality AND I’m also aware that many times there is a trap there wanting to suck you in for life. The trap has a name called “perfectionism” and it can keep you and your goals in a holding pen for months, years, or even a lifetime.
Which the trouble is, no matter what it won’t ever be “perfect.” It can be great and powerful, yet you could always find ways to improve anything. And that vicious cycle stifles our growth, follow through, and expression of the passion that wants to flow through us.
Yesterday I was on a walk in my neighborhood with thoughts about how amazing life is, how much life I want to live, and goals my heart wants to achieve. And for whatever reason I had the awareness that there isn’t an infinite amount of time to get after our goals and creating our best lives. We must take action in the time we have now. Yes, we can always improve and progress as long as we’re living; yet the truth is that our lives and our goals have an expiration date.
We have an expiration date for this life.
Our goals have an expiration date too.
My point in being so dramatic?
If we’re stuck in waiting for life to be perfect to make desired changes – to leave that job or relationship, to write that book or host that event, take that trip or get serious about the bucket list – all in the name of waiting for it to be “perfect”, we will likely have regrets. And that is no way to live.
So ask yourself, what’s something I am putting off doing or completing because I’m waiting for it to be perfect?
Is it writing your book or producing a product?
Is it waiting to market yourself until you have another certification?
Is it staying where you’re waiting for the perfect time to change what’s burning in your heart?
What if we could change that perspective to one of progress versus perfection?
For me, this is your most important goal: PROGRESS, not perfection.
Progress is realistic. Progress can happen every day. Progress is how we tackle an overwhelming, huge, and out-of-our-comfort-zone type of goal.
Coaching Assignment:
Consider a goal that you’ve always wanted to go for, but haven’t yet. Write it down.
Identify 3 to 5 simple actions you could begin taking TODAY and do it. Then pick one and do it!
Place the phrase, “Perfect is Great, DONE is Better” somewhere where you will see it often.
Realize that under perfectionism is simply just fear holding you hostage. The fears of “what if I fail? Or is it good enough? What will people think? Who am I to share this?” are all very common culprits creating the perfectionism trap.
Take your power back from the fears of you or your project needing to be perfect and invest it into the path of progress. Your progress is what creates your life and your results, with all its beautiful imperfections along the way.
Isn’t it time?!
I thought so too.
Let me know how it goes.
Love,
Tiffany
Why I Broke Up With Sugar
I’m choosing to forgo my formal “Success Tips” today in lieu of having a candid conversation with you.
You know how some things you love are simply just bad for you? Or perhaps too much of something or someone isn’t great for you? Sometimes too much of a good thing can throw us off balance.
Perhaps for you or someone you love, it may be a serious alcohol or drug or gambling addiction. It could also be an addiction to social media or television as a way of staying numbed out. It shows up in staying in a relationship that isn’t healthy for you or perhaps it’s constantly maxing out your credit card hoping the newest pair of shoes or handbag will feed the shopper’s high in helping you fill the void.
We all have addictions.
Some are extremely serious, as in life threatening. And some are not as serious at first glance, yet can steal our peace, confidence, and our greatest resource, our time.
One of my addictions has been sugar. I love cookies, cakes, cupcakes, chocolate, and hot cocoa. These are lovely things to be enjoyed yet too much of them can make you sick, tired, overweight, exhausted, etc. And in all transparency, sometimes the sweets for me cover up what I’m not wanting to feel or address emotionally.
So it was time for us to take a break, Mr. Sugar and I.
Today I am 50 days sugar clean of a 90 day public commitment to let go of sugar in the forms of sweets and treats. I am eating fruit or natural forms of sugar. Some days have been easy and some days it’s been hell. It’s been a good challenge for me to find many delicious recipes that are sweet yet without processed sugar. The first 10 days were the most challenging physically as my body was detoxing sugar out of my system. Yet what’s been interesting is the emotional component behind why I often reach for sweets – many times I would reach for sweets out of boredom or feeling lonely. As that craving comes up, I’ve been asking myself, “what do I really want” and then listening to what my intuition tells me. It’s been a very interesting process of insightful learning.
Now I’m not saying that my sugar addiction compares to someone struggling with drugs or alcohol or say gambling or pornography. Yet we all have things we may turn to in filling the emotional voids we struggle with in life to numb out, feel better, or bandaid the wounds we deal with.
So before you get depressed reading this, I want to share that there is great healing and empowerment that comes when we are willing to muster the courage to look at what is creating the real pain, the cravings, or temptations behind our behaviors. We can change. We can regain control over our lives, bodies, our time, and ultimately our destiny.
So consider for yourself, are you numbing out or avoiding what isn’t working in your life?
Are you covering up feelings of low self worth or loneliness with pornography, food, shopping, or incessant time on social media?
Are you procrastinating pursuing your dreams with living on Facebook, Twitter, or Pinterest?
Are you covering your loneliness for real connection with online relationships?
With awareness comes the ability to make new choices.
With new choices, we shape the quality of our lives.
When we are willing to work through the emotional voids and wounds we feel by facing them, we take our power back.
As a mentor of mine has repetitively taught me, “The best way out is through.” To face the discomfort versus run, hide, or cover it.
I embarked upon my sugar cleanse for a variety of reasons – I wanted to see if there was a real difference in my energy that others claim. I wanted more mental clarity and spiritual discernment. I wanted to influence my body pH to be in an alkaline state. And overall, I wanted the self mastery challenge to show I can do it. Some people climb Everest, some of us give up sugar. Both will bring about intense learning for the participant.
I am learning that my word tastes better than anything I could eat – that honoring my integrity as I gave my word to my inner circle that I would do this – is the sweetest dessert there is.
I am learning that I am stronger than any craving or red velvet cupcake that I’m presented with…(it does help not to inhale the scent of freshly baked goods).
I am learning that I have some things in me that need some attention and healing.
I am learning that doing the things I believe I cannot do is the biggest surge of human excitement – and confidence – there is.
I am learning to be more compassionate with myself and with others as we all have our mountains to face and addictions to heal.
My path with my sugar cleanse is outlined for 90 days – until April 1st. From there I’m not sure how I’ll navigate it. I’m not saying that I won’t have sugar ever again, yet I know that I will be more aware than I ever have been related to how much of it I’m consuming. If anything, that is a Universal lesson for us all – is simply waking up to how much we’re consuming on auto pilot. For you that mean the Internet for others it’s food or sugar or shopping. Becoming aware of what we are doing – conscious creation – is a powerful place to live our lives from.
Grab your notebook or journal and consider your thoughts & responses to the following introspective questions:
- Where in my life am I over indulging? Why am I doing that?
- Where in my life am I putting off something that no longer works for me? Why am I doing that?
- Where in my life am I giving my power, money, or time away to? Why am I doing that?
- What would I rather experience? Why is that important to me?
- What do I CHOOSE?
I do believe that no matter what you face that there is always hope for positive change. That as an aware human being that you also can master any challenge or temptation that besets you. You have the courage to create the life that your heart desires. You have what it takes to face what isn’t working and fix it, heal it, or remove it. Where there is choice, there is power.
I believe in you, my friend and fellow traveler on the path.
With love & gratitude,
Tiffany
The Action Antidote
The Action Antidote
Let’s take an inventory, shall we?
You likely can relate to one or more of the following scenarios:
1. You know that you’re ready to do something new in your life -write a book, leave your corporate gig, create a new relationship, buy some really big new thing… and you’re scared.
2. You’re wanting to create some new thing in your life, but you’ve never ever done it before… and you don’t know where to start.
3. You’re feeling so overwhelmed with all there is to do to run a business or your life (or both) so in the midst of all the overwhelm, frustration, and anxiety… you allow distractions (social media, food, off topic projects) to steal your time instead.
The antidote to all of these challenges is found in Taking Action. Now it’s not to say that there are not other influences to some of these challenges you’re facing – yet all of these scenarios require action to move forward and create positive change.
I love what Norman Vincent Peale says about action…
“Action is a great restorer and builder of confidence. Inaction is not only the result, but the cause, of fear. Perhaps the action you take will be successful; perhaps different action or adjustments will have to follow. But any action is better than no action at all.”
Isn’t that incredible wisdom? He was right on the money. And so are you when you get into action.
As Mike Dooley said last weekend, “Action breeds clarity” – you likely may be waiting for more information, the perfect website, or another certification, or to lose another 10 pounds before you will take the action that will create the outcome you want. Interestingly enough, the clarity is often found in the doing – by taking action towards your goals.
So dare to take a little more action – it doesn’t have to be a massive overhaul – although it can be and quite an adventure! Even if you take a little more action – say making a few sales calls about your new venture – before having the perfect website or business card, you will learn so much more and increase your likelihood of sales! Imagine that!
You may find yourself drawn to meeting someone new so you could create an online dating profile and put yourself out there – you may love it or hate it, but that action will breed more clarity for you. So will dating – you’ll learn more (clarity) about what you do want or don’t want in a relationship.
You may find yourself drawn to a new career path – you could take classes, attend a networking event, or take someone to lunch in that industry to learn more of what it would be like. That action will create more clarity for you.
Whatever your goal or desire is, by taking more action you can only gain more clarity and guidance of what you do want in your life.
One thought shared by personal development pioneer, Buckminster Fuller is “You can never learn less. You can only learn more.” Action increases the velocity of what we’re learning. By taking more action, we get more clear, and with that clarity we can adjust, improve, and create what it is that we want.
Coaching Assignment:
So your homework for the week – what’s one thing, goal, or change you’re drawn to in your life? Consider if you were to take action towards that direction, what would that be? If you feel overwhelmed, ask yourself, what’s one simple action I could take, focused on the simple?
As you take more action in your life – versus thinking and thinking and thinking about it – you will create faster and greater clarity for yourself, which in turn will propel you forward to what you want.
Cheering you on!
Tiffany
Success Circle – The 8 Stages of Commitment
Guest expert, Sean Smith, Master NLP & Success Coach!
Do You Have Commitment Issues?
Committing to Your Goals
New Year’s Resolutions.
Do you love em or hate em?
Regardless of how you feel about them, it’s estimated that by January 24th of the New Year, 92% of people have abandoned them. Big time commitment issues, right?
Yes. And perhaps the ever bigger issue is that for most people they set themselves up to fail with the following common challenges:
- Set pie in the sky goals = unrealistic
- Set goals that are all or nothing = perfect or bust
- Set goals that are vague = lack of clear direction
Can you relate to any of those challenges yourself?
I know I’ve been guilty of them as well myself. I use to have the running joke that my New Year’s Resolutions could be the same list laminated and simply change out the year with a dry erase marker.
But regardless of the negative stigma attached to New Year resolutions, I do believe in goals with all my heart. I am a huge fan of having goals and I’m a bigger fan of having realistic action steps that feel doable to follow through on.
Goals to me are like the guideposts or lighthouses if you will that guide my path and grant navigational points that assist me to consciously create the life and results I desire.
So here are a few tips that help me create goals that I can truly COMMIT to…
- Decide what I want. Sounds simple, right? You’d be surprised of how often people are not clear on what they want. They can rattle off a list of things they don’t want, are sick & tired of, etc. yet consider, are you focused and clear on what you do want to have?
- Pick SMALL goals to support a large vision. Yes there are lots of things I want to achieve – amazing health & vitality, publish a book, enjoy loving relationships, triple my sales, travel to Paris, etc. We all have dreams and visions, yet when it comes to goals, focus on specific, smaller goals that you can follow through on. For instance, one of my health goals right now is that I have greens everyday in my nutrition. It’s clear and specific…and most importantly, DOABLE. It’s something I can commit to on a daily basis. I am green juicing every single day and I’m feeling amazing. So consider what would be the small steps to do on a daily/weekly basis that create the outcome that you want? This is a million dollar question my friends. I’d copy & paste it somewhere if I were you! By small and simple things are great things brought to pass.
- The accountability factor. If you know that commitment issues with your goals is huge for you, increase your odds of success 1000% with some added nudges from accountability sources. This could be hiring a coach, creating a mastermind group, or teaming up with an accountability buddy. A good friend of mine has said, “Accountability, not ability, determines your results.” If you want different results, create the support structure that will help you get there. For me, I participate in two masterminds and two accountability partnerships – each provides accountability along with different strengths for all my goals and desired changes. When in doubt, get support!
Look, there are plenty of great resources out there that are teaching these similar things, right? The real deal is to ACT upon them. So you know where you struggle and where you shine.
So for you, what do you need to commit to?
What are you putting off, excusing, hiding from in your life?
And is that what you really want? Truly?
Change can happen at anytime we choose. That could be right now! This very instant you can put your life on a new path.
In creating change, my best coaching advice is to pick ONE thing that you’re 100% committed to. You don’t need to take on 20 new changes at once – just ONE. What’s that ONE thing for you that you will commit to you to create the outcome you desire?
Commit to it. Give your whole heart to it. I’ve found that the decision is the hardest part of change. Once the decision is made, the commitment & follow through are much easier. It is a complete struggle when I am on the fence with something or knowing that something is a “good idea” yet have no resolve.
“There are many ways to cross the river –
you just must have both feet in one boat.”
– Zen Proverb
Our commitment level is always reflected in our results.
My focus for first quarter are two major changes for my health: no processed sugar for 90 days (I’m 22 days and counting!!) and green juicing every day! I’ve done both every day this month and I’m feeling so clear and energized (another article to share in detail). I’m choosing to state this in public, to you, to increase my own accountability. And like I just said above, the decision on both choices was the hardest part. It’s easy to follow through because there is CLEAR commitment in my life.
This is my example of simple changes. What is yours? What will be yours?
Your VERY best life is waiting. Not your mediocre life. Your BEST life – the one you deserve, the one that flashes glimpses to you every so often, the one you know is yours to be claimed.
Firm up your resolve and COMMIT to yourself your simple changes and goals.
Great results are in store for you. Will I see you there?
Cheering you on!
Tiffany