I’m thrilled to be sharing one of my very favorite topics of all time, the power of excellent self care! This is part one in a three-part series, sharing with you some tips and tools to help you up level your self care so you increase your confidence, which in turn will increase your results.
When you think about yourself, I want you to take a simple inventory for me. Grab a piece of paper, or pull out your iPad to take some notes with. On a scale of one to ten, ten being high and one being low, I just want you to take an inventory. And there’s no right or wrong answer to this, it’s just being honest with yourself and where you are. As you think about your current physical well-being, your sleep quality, your energy level, your – just being in your body, where would you currently rate your physicality on a scale of 1 to 10? Where would you currently rank how well you feel physically?
RATE your PHYSICAL HEALTH on a scale of 1-10
Secondly, I want you to look at spiritually – your purpose, your passion, your connection to your Higher Power, whether that be God, Source, the Universe, feeling alive and grateful, peacefulness, joy, that your life has purpose and power, and that you feel comfortable and confident in your own skin. On the same thing, scale of one to ten, ten high, one low, where would you currently rate your own spiritual connectivity to yourself and to life?
RATE your SPIRITUAL CONNECTION on a scale of 1-10
And third, I want you to consider the mental component of feeling stimulated – feeling like you’re reading good books or that you’re learning, that you’re growing, that you feel excited about life and projects, and that there’s time to read or nurture your brain and things that matter to you. It could be time also for hobbies that matter to you as well. When it comes to that component, the mental/emotional side of your life, one to ten, how comfortable, how happy, how progressive do you currently feel life is for you – again same thing, scale of one to ten. There’s no judgment here, it’s just being aware of where you’re starting and what you want to create.
RATE your MENTAL FULFILLMENT on a scale of 1-10
Sometimes when I’m coaching people, their number one goal in hiring me or coming to one of my events is they want to grow their sales and their income. It’s a great goal to have, right? I help a lot of people do just that. I always start with self care, no matter what client or group I’m working with. The level of their current self care directly impacts their self confidence, and their self confidence, directly impacts their sales and results.
“Your self worth will equal your net worth.”
– Jim Rohn
I believe you are your number one asset. It’s like the goose and the golden eggs. I know that’s an old fable that’s been told for many years, yet the concept is true. You may be saying, “I want more golden eggs,” or “I want bigger, brighter, shinier golden eggs,” then we simply must take care of the goose that’s producing that outcome.
Sometimes we get that backwards. We say, “I want more outcome, more production, more revenue, more sales, more income – that means I’m going to have to burn the candle at both ends, and push push push push myself to exhaustion.” You can only do that for so long before that will catch up to you. At the core of your success is your confidence level, and underneath confidence is your self-worth and esteem that’s fueled by your self care.
See, unfortunately for many of you, the only time you’re really doing anything of a self care nature is Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, or your birthday. It’s as if you’ve got to have a special day just to go do something kind for yourself or to be recognized without the guilt of feeling selfish or lazy. I’m asking you, as your coach, to up-level your self care, that you take better care of yourself so you can see, feel, and experience the results of greater success, sales, and enjoyment of life.
The first habit I want to focus on here in part one is what’s called the Morning Ritual. You probably at some point have heard the concept of having a power hour. Now I don’t call it power hour because that indicates it needs to be a full hour, and for many of you, you’re saying, “I hardly have a few minutes to myself, let alone a full hour.” Anytime we’re trying to establish a new habit, I want you to think in terms of “move the needle” for sustainable progress. I care more about creating the habit than the amount of time.
Let’s look at a morning ritual. An ideal morning ritual has three components to it: spiritual, mental and physical. Spiritual is how you connect to what makes you feel connected spiritually – to your Higher Power, to Source, God, your Maker – there are a variety of different names or titles. Ideally your morning starts by getting connected spiritually. That might be prayer, meditation, reading or listening to something that inspires your heart or your soul, some journalling, some gratitude listing, etc. I want you to feel more connected spiritually. CONNECTION is the point of these activities. Gratitude listing and making a gratitude journal is a great way to do that. List out for yourself – what are a few activities that would help you feel connected spiritually? Now that might take two minutes, and that might take twenty minutes – that’s entirely up to you.
What CONNECTS you spiritually?
Second would be mental. And the way I describe or define the mental component to your morning ritual is anything that stimulates possibility or personal growth. That might be looking at your vision board, that might be reviewing your goals, that might be visualization of the things you’re wanting to attract. It could also be reading great books, personal development, that stimulates your brain. Research has proven that the world’s wealthiest people, on average, read thirty minutes a day of content that stimulates their brain, develops their craft – it’s some form of personal or professional development. So reading would be here as well. You could read, again visualize, review your goals, look at your vision board, but something that stimulates possibility and growth.
Are you INVESTING in your personal growth?
And third is physical, getting your body moving. Now some of you might say, “I don’t have time to do a full workout,” right? This could be a few yoga poses or stretches, or a series of sit ups or push-ups, to get your body moving. It could be a brisk walk around your neighborhood. Whether it’s a full workout or a few minutes of stretching, what matters is that you make the deposit. The time amount is entirely up to you.
Are you moving your body, even if it’s a little bit of time?
Let’s talk time. All I ask of each of you – to implement and live consistently – is the habit I call The Sacred Ten. That at minimum, the first ten minutes of your day gets to be invested into you. You’ve got at least 1o minutes. Begin your day with YOU – not your cell phone, Facebook, or email. Again, I don’t care how much time you commit to it. It isn’t about quantity, it’s about quality. What does matter – Are you connecting and nurturing yourself on a daily basis? I invite you to consider that if you’re starting your day, every day, on the agenda of someone else, your self-worth is not in your own hands, right? Far too often we might start our day on our smart phones looking at Instagram or Facebook or jumping into our email. Many of you are parents, and you might immediately be into parenting role. Ideally you’re going to get up at least ten to fifteen minutes before your children, and before you touch your phone and look at all of that data – you’re going to invest in you. Getting to your own life first, rather than reading about everyone else’s life on social media or your inbox which is often the agenda of other people. You’re worth the investment.
You’re worth it. You’re worthy and deserving of that. And the repercussion, the results – is when you start your day positively, you’re shaping your day for awesome experiences. And truthfully, your days become your weeks and your months and your years – is it’s how you start that day definitely shapes your life, shapes your success, and your results. Starting today or tomorrow morning with that Sacred Ten – that you put the first ten minutes of your day into you to get nurtured and centered before you move into your roles with other people.
If you want more tips and tools, to stay connected with me, I’d love to do so. Go to Tiffanyspeaks.com and make sure to claim your FREE training to maximize your goals. You can also find me on Facebook at Coach Tiffany Peterson. I look forward to seeing you in future segments, parts two and three of this self care series, and I look forward to connecting with you then!
When you look at life and you study success, there’s this quote that says, “Success leaves clues.” When you want to create anything new in your life, you want to up-level it, create something brand new, create greater health, wealth, relationships, connectivity, happiness – it’s all found in your habits.
There is research out of Duke University that says forty percent of our daily actions are habitual. At least forty percent of daily actions, we’re not even consciously thinking about. Those are not conscious decisions. They are habits. Think about this: the way you drive into the office, or you get ready, or you brush your teeth, or you make a meal, or whatever it may be, there’s lots of times once we’ve learned how to do something and it becomes habitual, our brain goes into this subconscious auto-pilot. So the majority of our influence is going to be found in what habits we’re possessing, what we’re currently creating, and what we’re doing on a regular basis. It was Aristotle who said, “Excellence is not an act, but a habit.”
So when you think about that for yourself is – when you’re creating any new result, any new outcome, is to ask yourself – what habits do I need to have in place to create that outcome? I love the simple model “habits equal results.”
HABITS = RESULTS
It’s simple. It’s easy, right? But that’s where we have to engage a little bit more with our conscious brain, to become aware. We have to say what results do I want? And then to begin with the end in mind – what outcome do I want, what result do I want, then asking ourselves – what actions, what habits do I need to be employing and creating consistently on a regular basis?
There’s this simple process I teach in my seminars and workshops called the “5% more” exercise and it is simply that. Consider, if you were to take 5% more action or more responsibility for any area of your life, what would those things be?
I’m inviting you to make changes in your life. What you’re after is sustainable change. If you’re after sustainable change, then we need to look at your habits. What I love about the “5% more” is it’s the move-the-needle mindset, it’s after sustainability. Sometimes when we’re trying to make change, we go for pie-in-the-sky, big, huge goals. What’s going to sustain over time and create consistency and therefore the outcome is what you’re doing regularly, consistently, into your life, your business, your sales, your health, your relationships. We all know that what we do every once in a while can feel great, but it’s what we do regularly that creates the outcome that we want.
So consider this for me. I want you to write down in your notes or your notebook this concept of “5% more”. And I want you to go through multiple topics. On a blank sheet of paper at the very top say, if I were to take five percent more action on my health I would … – maybe you’d say I’d go to bed by 11:00 every night. I would drink more water. Be clear and specific how much water that would look like. You might say I would meditate on a regular basis, or I might go to yoga twice a week. If you were to take five percent more action for your health, what would those simple little changes be?
And then I want you to move next to sales or business. If you own your own business or if you’re in sales in some capacity or in any area of your life or your career, if I were to take five percent more action in my careeer/job or sales, I would… –maybe you say I would follow up with five more people every single week, I would go to lunch with a member of my network, I would create that newsletter and send it out on a regular basis, I would take that management training class or read that leadership book. But just small, simple things that can help you move the needle of progress.
Same thing I want you to do in your finances, in your relationships. Relationships, I love that one. Say if I were to take five percent more responsibility or more action for the connectivity or the quality of my relationships, I would ________ (fill in the blank for yourself).
What I love about this mindset is it puts you in the driver’s seat. You’re saying I am the creator of the quality of my life. I own that my results are on me. So how do I start to move the needle? What are the small simple things that, when done regularly and repetitively, create a powerful habit that then produces the outcome that you want?
One of my favorite success quotes of all time is the Zen proverb that says, “Before enlightenment: chopping wood, carrying water. After enlightenment: chopping wood, carrying water.” So much of life’s success is found one hundred percent in those habits, or in essence chopping that wood, carrying that water. That’s true for your health, right? Your health, where you’re at today in energy level, in vitality, in weight, has everything to do with your habits. Not what we do or eat every once in a while, it’s what we’re doing regularly that’s creating that current outcome. Same thing in our business. Same thing in our marriage or close personal relationships. Ask yourself that: what one habit do I need to implement? Consider this for yourself, for this week, this month, this year, – ask of yourself “What one habit would have the most impact in my life?”
And look at each category. What habit in your health, in your business, in your home, in your relationships, would have the most influence or the most impact? I love this thought process. Some people think, “Gosh, isn’t that thinking too small?” When you’re in the business of change, and you’re saying I want to help myself or help others change anything, small consistent change that we do regularly, it now becomes a habit. Now you’re into the sweet spot of creating what you want.
There is nothing more influential to your success, your sales, your income, your business, your relationships, your health, than that of the attitude that you’re carrying with you in life. I want you to consider this concept by Stephen Covey where he says, “We see the world as the way that we are, not the way that it necessarily is.” Your attitude, in essence, is this concept of seeing through, say, a lens, right? Let’s say you’re wearing a sweet pair of shades. You’re going to see life a little differently with the lens that you’re seeing them through. Now consider, what if you were wearing shades that were zebra print, or pink, or orange, or hot fuchsia? That would definitely color the way that you’re seeing and playing life. I want you to become aware that the way you’re seeing things is definitely shaping the life, the results, and the outcome that you’re experiencing.
One of my favorite quotes comes from Albert Einstein, where he says, “The most important decision that we ever make as human beings is: Do I live in a hostile Universe or a friendly Universe?” In other words, is life working in your favor, or is life working against you and out to get you? I know it sounds like such a simple thing, but it’s monumental to the life and the results that you’re creating.
Now here’s the thing – It’s a choice.
Your attitude is a choice.
It’s a decision.
It isn’t something that you just were born with, like blue eyes, or brown, or green eyes. It’s something that you have a choice to – that you get to shape and you get to influence. So I invite you to consider that. What is your chosen belief and chosen attitude? I know for myself, a few years ago I made up my mind to believe, consciously, I made the choice to believe that life is always working for my highest good, my highest favor. Now can I prove that? Absolutely not. However, what kind of results do you think I always keep creating if I choose to have the lens that life’s always working out for me? Even when I go through the tough stuff, the heartbreak, the challenge, the mishap, something that doesn’t work out, a disappointment – like the rest of you – all of those things I go through too, yet because I choose to believe that life is working in my favor, I can always find the lesson, the nugget, the silver lining or in my life, seeing how God’s hand has been directing me.
I love the scripture in Romans 8:28 that says, “All things work together for your good, for those that love God.” Now however you hold this space for God, Source, the Universe, Life, I don’t care what title you use – but that Higher Power in your life of choosing to believe and to trust that it is working out for you favorably. Now again, that’s a choice and a decision.
A couple of years ago I went through a mentoring program with Jack Canfield. It was a powerful, very influential experience in my life. He’s a dear friend and mentor. And he exposed me to one of the most powerful, profound life formulas I’ve ever read, listened to, or been taught. And it’s simply this: E + R equals O. I’ll show it to you. Pretty simple: the E stands for event, the R stands for response, and O stands for outcome.
Event + Response = Outcome
See, we all have a variety of different events all the time. There are small things to big things, right? Things that we perceive as positive, perceive as negative. Things that we are ecstatic with joy over, and things that break our hearts, and a lot of life in between all of that. But you always have the power to choose how you respond, right? This is where the power center comes in for you, is right here – is saying, “Okay, here’s the event, here’s my chosen response, now here’s the outcome.”
Years ago there was this Lexus dealership in southern California and they hit into some pretty challenging times in terms of economics. What that challenging economic time provided for that sales team was to get creative, to dig deep. They started driving out their cars to country clubs and high-end hotels, and more and more people started driving their cars. Now what happens when you drive a new car? Even if you have a nice car, when you drive that new car, you start to have that experience where you are now attached and wanting your own new car. Their sales went up significantly, even more than what they had done prior to the economic downturn. So what did that event create for them? They had to choose to respond. Now could they sit around the coffee break room and complain and whine about the challenges they were facing? Sure, and maybe they did at some point. But they ultimately got creative and innovative to dig deep to respond to the event they were up against to shape their outcome.
This is true for you, for me, for every one of us on this planet. What I love about the studies that are coming forward in personal development and spiritual psychology is we’re studying more and more about happiness. Sometimes you might be thinking the thought that “once I’m successful, then I’ll be happy,” where ironically, you’ve got to flip those. Because what we find is that people who are happy tend to create more and more success.
So I invite you to become aware, a conscious decision, today, that says this, “I choose to be happy. I choose to believe that life is working in my favor. I choose to show up with passion and life and enthusiasm.” You have that choice. It’s yours to make.
Thanks so much for reading – tune in next week for my next segment.
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There are lots of things, events, and outcomes we cannot control –
and we can create a lot of drama, struggle, and misery in our lives trying to do so…
A few weeks ago I wrote a lengthy Facebook post (see image below) that contained my own personal aha and awareness for the life event that I was facing – competing in eWomen Network’s North America’s Next Greatest Speaker Contest in Dallas, Texas.
I had been selected as a Top Ten Finalist (thank you for voting for me!!!) amongst over 1,000 applications. Talk about humbled. And talk about the internal pressure that I felt at times to “perform”. I was definitely putting myself out there and even asking others to “judge” me and my heart so the emotions at times were ripe for the learning.
So in my preparing for this experience, early one morning I had this awareness that took my power back from the fear, the perfectionism, the outcome…I can only control how I SHOW UP – and how I choose to experience this or any experience.
In life at times, you will face heartache, struggle, and challenge.
Some times people will lie about you or betray you.
Or politics may win out.
Others may criticize you.
They may say “no” to your offer, services, or product.
Your book might be rejected 144 times before you get a yes.
Your date request denied.
You may not make the honor roll, get the lead in the play, or get into the school of your choice the first time around. Or second. Or third.
You may be passed up for the promotion.
You may not be included.
You might be ignored.
You may not hit the rank you want when you want.
__________ insert your own here.
There are many more scenarios that all lead to the same point:
You can’t control the outcome. You can only control how you SHOW UP.
How do you choose to SHOW UP regardless of the outcome?
Here is the full post written in it’s own authentic, inspired form:
For me, there is great peace in focusing on the only thing I can always control, influence, or direct in my life: how I show up.
And like I said in my post, I choose to show up and play full out.
My heart on the line.
To give my best and the best service I can, whether they say yes or no.
So that’s the thought to ponder this week…in your life and in your experiences, how will you choose to show up?
There are many things, people, and outcomes we cannot control. We can influence yes, control, no. By muddling with trying to control the outcome, we create our own misery.
Our power, attention, and energy I find is best suited to be focused where the choice is 100% ours – with ourselves and how we choose to play the game of life being served right now.
Release the outcome.
And focus on showing up powerfully present, fully engaged, and loving no matter what.
That’s a life worth living… regardless of the outcome.
I love Spring and I love Fall – and I love how the two are connected. I’ve been spending time planting new flowers, weeding, and gardening quite a bit this last week. I love the new season that is upon us.
Gardening is symbolic of life – planting, nourishing, weeding, and when done consistently, beautiful and amazing results follow our efforts.
Your business and success in life is just like a garden. What we plant and nourish (for positive or negative) will bring forth results that match our efforts. The great news is that we are the gardener of our lives – with the ability to shape and create the results we desire.
Now, many times we face hot opposition, struggles, lack of motivation, or frustration in not seeing the results as fast as we would like. That’s normal and common to every person on the planet. Yet what separates you from the common is how you respond to that opposition…
I invite you to take 3 minutes and watch this simple, yet profoundly powerful video – The Law of the Harvest – where I promise you that something shared in this video will be a nugget you’re needing or searching for…for this one Universal truth changes everything.
Your Harvest can never be prevented when you do your part to nourish your goals, sales, and business on a regular basis. Push through your “July” when it shows up and you also will meet with success!